Bojan the Top7 Dog

Celebrity Deathmatch: Boy Band Edition

rebecca@top7.com — Sat, 13 Aug 2011 14:16:45 +0000

The top is a lonely place, only enough room for one. Whether its Team Edward or Team Jacob, Jen vs. Angelina, or the champion of the Premier League. One such competition for top status that we thought we’d leave behind in 1999 was the Backstreet Boys vs. ‘NSync question: who would reign as boy band kings?

We’re officially in not one, but two decades later, and Entertainment Weekly is still dissecting this question. But what they really don’t understand is that perhaps it isn’t a question of BSB vs. Justin and the gang. On Top7, it’s all boy bands after the crowning glory of the #1 spot, and the Backstreeters beat NSync by a mile – with the Jonas Brothers, Westlife, and even the Jackson 5 ahead of NSync in the pack.

It may be true that Justin Timberlake brought sexy back with his sweet moves, falsetto voice and brillo-pad hair, but the sum was not greater than all the parts of NSync according to the fans. The people have spoken: Long live the Backstreet Boys, at least in our hearts.

Check out the results here, and rank your opinion!

Superpowers for One, Superpowers for All!

rebecca@top7.com — Thu, 28 Jul 2011 17:07:59 +0000

Priorities are something that for most people change through the years. An eight year old boy can’t think past his next GI Joe or Transformers figure, while an eighteen year old boy has a decidedly different idea on his one track mind. An eighty-year old, if he can remember his priorities, probably has more practical things on the mind.

As it turns out, a lot of hypothetical questions involving priorities reflect that skew from age. When we asked people what superpowers they wish they would receive, 775 people responded. This was the general top seven results for the whole topic and all voters::

1 Invisibility
2 Flying
3 Mind Reading
4 teleportation
5 time travel
6 immortality
7 instant healing

However, interestingly enough, immortality in particular was a much higher priority for the younger voters! If you were under 15 voting on this topic, you helped propel this superpower to the #3 slot for your age group. On the other hand, if you were over 35 voting on this topic, you cared much less for forever-living and the item dropped to #7. Could this mean that the older you get the less you like life?
Or, perhaps its something else. For the young crowd, time travel was only their #6, but the over #35 set ranked it their top choice! So maybe this could mean that the older crowd doesn’t want to live infinitely as old folks, but rather prefers to re-live their glory days.
Perhaps their years sitting in traffic also influence why they care so much more about teleportation than the youngsters, or their years of backaches leading them to value instant healing a bit more too. But topics like this really go to show you what a difference age makes in priorities!

Under 15
1 Invisibility (same from the general list)
2 Flying Ability (same)
3 Immortality (up from #6)
4 Mind Reading (down from #3)
5 Teleportation (down from #4)
6 Time Travel (down from #5)
7 Instant Healing (same)

Over 35
1 Time Travel (up from #5)
2 Teleportation (up from #4)
3 Mind Reading (same)
4 Invisibility (down from #1)
5 Flying ability (down from #2)
6 Instant Healing (up from #7)
7 Immortality (down from #6)

Click here to vote: http://top7.com/top/408/Superpowers-I-Wish-I-Had/rank#rank
Click here to check out results: http://top7.com/top/408/Superpowers-I-Wish-I-Had
Click here to vote on who you admire most: http://top7.com/top/309/People-I-Admire/rank#rank

God, Jesus and Lady Gaga

rebecca@top7.com — Mon, 11 Jul 2011 16:26:17 +0000

God, Jesus and Lady Gaga are sitting around your dinner table. No, this isn’t the beginning of a dirty joke, this is the top candidates of who people would like to invite to dinner.**

In the most extensive poll of its kind, people were presented with the topic People to Invite to a Dinner Party. They chose from candidates real and fictional, biblical and historical, scientific and entertainment-related. And not only did they have all these diverse candidates to choose from, but they also had the ability to invite more than one of their favorite people, in the order of just how much they would like to wine and dine them. You can learn a lot about a person, or a community, that way it seems.

Rounding out the top 10, in order, are
1 God
2 Jesus
3 Lady Gaga
4 Barack Obama
5 Megan Fox
6 Michael Jackson
7 David Beckham
8 Albert Einstein
9 Ellen DeGeneres
10 Elvis Presley

It seems that overall, people would have a very well-rounded dinner conversation. Religion is represented by God and Jesus, while science is represented by Einstein. Politics stands in with Obama, while sheer hotness comes from Megan Fox and David Beckham. Becks also provides athletic entertainment, while the laughs come from Ellen DeGeneres. The musical entertainment around the table will come from three different royals: both kings (Elvis, the King and MJ, the King of Pop) and the Lady of Gaga.

Seating Lady Gaga with God and Jesus could pose some thorny issues since she just crafted a love song to Judas, but we’re all adults, and I think they can work it out. Personally, I would seat Tupac with Confucius, Isaac Newton next to Snooki, and myself next to Detective Elliot Stabler. But the community has spoken. And they have said “God, Jesus, and Lady Gaga.” The Holy Trinity for the 21st Century.

If you’d like to see the full results, click here.
If you’d like to put in your two cents, click here.
If the people you admire don’t consist of the current favorites “Grandparent, Britney Spears, Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi”, then click here to rank that too.

**Okay: it’s also the beginning of a dirty joke. But you have to sign up for our premium service to hear it (costs $100 for entry.)

Tennis Time: Rafa versus Roger

rebecca@top7.com — Wed, 08 Jun 2011 14:28:00 +0000

It’s June. June is the month where we have the Summer Solstice, Father’s Day, and the holiday I like to call Tennis Time. Well, it’s not so much of a holiday as a state of being, or perhaps a religion. But for people/dogs like me, it is the best and holiest time of the year.

This year's French Open mens' singles champion, Rafael Nadal

The period of weeks starting from the beginning of the Roland Garros tournament through the end of Wimbledon are sacrosanct, with my face glued to the TV, and my eyes darting side-to-side with each volley. It’s started to make me think that the world is shaking in my regular vision, but so be it. Yes I also love the other Grand Slam tournaments, but there’s something about that Parisian clay and that English grass that is just more special than the others. Just look to Martin Solveig’s “Hello” video for proof. And what’s more, the excitement from the first serve of the French Open doesn’t even have time to subside until the last point of Wimbedon. I’m so excited right now that my tail is wagging hard enough to potentially be propelled into outter space.

I’m super thrilled right now too, because my personal favorite player is Rafael “Rafa” Nadal. I liked him in Shakira’s music video, and I also like that he looks like a mosquito. Furthermore, I think he is a fantastic player. But do Top7 rankers agree with me? Well, not so much. That is to say, they like him alright but they’re Federer fanatics, ranking Roger #1 consistently, and across all demographics. I guess they like squinty-eyed Swiss more than … well, squity-eyed Spaniards.

You can't argue with results - Or can you?

So to the Top7 community, it doesn’t much matter that Rafael Nadal just won his sixth French Open title this week. They think it’s cool, or whatever, they guess. Though he may have beaten Roger Federer in the final, Nadal is only second best in their eyes.

Aww this just makes you want to eat them up for dinner.

To see the results CLICK HERE

To vote on your favorite CLICK HERE

Pressing Play on Born This Way

rebecca@top7.com — Mon, 30 May 2011 16:50:33 +0000

Born this Way, Lady Gaga’s highly anticipated new album just dropped, and crazy as it seems, this is actually only her second album. We now have about twice as many songs to listen to by today’s reigning queen of pop.

What else dropped? Her newest song. Not “Judas” – “Three Way”. When Justin Timberlake hosted SNL with Lady Gaga as musical guest, they premiered “Three Way”, their homage to the acceptability of a menage a trois with each other, so long as there’s a chick involved somehow. Her guest appearance on Andy Samberg and Justin Timberlake’s tune about the golden rule is now viral as the diseases those characters in the videos likely have.

An Unstoppable Trio

But as for her solo work, nearly 5000 Top7 users voted for their favorite Lady GaGa songs, and there appears to be a consensus on which ones are the best across genders and age groups. First off, every single demographic considers “Bad Romance” to be the most epic Lady GaGa song to date. The ode to love gone bad resonated with all the fans the most, or maybe it easy to remember chorus of “Ra Ma Ra Ma Ma Ga Ga Ooh La La” — lyrical genius.

This is how I break up with people too.

Next up, most Top7 user demographics appreciated GaGa’s anthem of self-acceptance slash alien birth, “Born this Way”, but in all demographics above 25 years old, the song actually dropped from #2 favorite to #7 favorite. it seems that the farther the audience was from their own birth, the less they appreciated the song.

Coming in at #3 for all groups was GaGa’s rebuke of cellular communications, aptly titled “Telephone”. For 25-25 year olds, it was higher, at #2, and the over 35 year old set, probably not understanding her beef with the telephone device they love so dearly, the song came in at #4.

“Alejandro” appears as #4 in most groups, but boys like it for #5. The older you get the more likely you are to appreciate “Alejandro”, as for 25-35 year olds it comes in at #4, and for the 35+ set.

Rounding out the top 5 for most groups was the anthem for gambling technique: “Poker Face”. Men liked it a little better, coming in at #4, and also same for 25-35 year olds. The 35+ crowd liked it as #3.

This time her bad romance betrayed Jesus.

And the rest of the hits? “Judas,” her newest single, didn’t crack the top 5 except for with 13-17 year old girls, at #5. “Just Dance” was the most popular with 25-35 year olds, who apparently best appreciate GaGa’s debut single. And my personal favorite, the ballad of the invasive photographer, “Paparazzi” was most popular with those over 35.

Want to see the results? Click here.
Want to put in your two cents? Click here.
Interested in Lady GaGa’s favorite outfits? Click here.

Beating the iPhone at Its Own Games

rebecca@top7.com — Sun, 22 May 2011 15:42:28 +0000

I waited in line overnight and then when I had it in my paws, it was a dream come true. When I finally ripped my sparkly new iPhone out of the hands of that store clerk, it was a magical moment never to be forgotten. But that moment was fleeting. After that initial tingly feeling of elation came over me, suddenly a crushing sense of doom set in. Why? Because this darn thing is full of infinite possibilities and I had no idea where to start. Certainly not by making a phone call! That is so 2004.

I often find myself in line for things, so I figured I would get some games. I can now get something USEFUL done as I wait for the bathroom at Starbucks. But seriously there are umpteen million to choose from. Angry Birds was a given. I’m a dog so the thought of flinging birds all over the place is pretty appealing. And Top7 rankers agreed with that statement – of every age group and equally amongst men and women, Angry Birds is generally agreed to be THE game to get for your iPhone. So it is settled. Angry Birds is on my phone now, to the delight of all those billionaires in Finland at Rovio Mobile.

Doodle Jump is definitely second on the to-game list. It appears in the top 5 for every age group, although if you’re 18-35 it rounds out your top five whereas if you’re younger than 18 or older than 35, odds are its higher. That four-legged thingamabobber looks pretty delicious to me also, most importantly, human people enjoy how its like an iPhone Wii game where you move your entire phone in order to play.

Jetpacks are so hot right now.

Fruit Ninja is also a must have. Who ever thought slicing fruit would be such an addictive activity? Working at Jamba Juice must be highly rewarding. It is universally in the top five games for everyone, men, women, and across all ages.

Boys love Assassin’s Creed and Asphalt 5. Racing cars, like in Asphalt 5, is one of the more classic video game ideas so far for my iPhone from this list of the most best, but Assassin’s Creed is definitely a cool spin on the “killing people” genre of video games. When I started playing it, and the killing people aspect of the game was pretty standard, but learning about Renaissance history was definitely unexpected. When I caught myself suddenly super knowledgeable about ancient Jerusalem, I’ll tell you the truth: I felt a little violated.

Time travel is cool, but for added spice, it's better when you also kill people.

On the other hand, girls love Cut the Rope and Glee Karaoke. The latter is fairly straightforward as a game, but Cut the Rope is a pretty cool puzzle. Feeding the monster Om Nom with candy is kind of a creative game and also a clever way to promote childhood obesity. I kid, I kid. Everyone loves candy.

Vicariously snacking through this little monster-munchkin.

If you’re a teen, you’ll probably like Assassin’s Creed and Asphalt 5 a lot. Twenty somethings like those too, but if youre over 35, get your ghetto on because you’re probably going to be a fan of Original Gangstaz Rock. Not sure why the over 35 set likes to imagine themselves in a giant gang war, but I’m only three dog years old, so maybe one day I will understand.

To check out the results yourself, click HERE

And to add your two cents, click HERE to rank

Back from the Dead and Straight to the Top

rebecca@top7.com — Thu, 05 May 2011 12:42:08 +0000

This week, on May 1, we had the anniversary of the day Family Guy was brought back from beyond the grave and put right back in the primetime lineup. Apart from reboots like 90210 and Melrose Place, I can’t think of a single other precedent for this kind of thing. This really meant a lot for me because as a talking dog myself (or more of a canine scribe, as it were) Brian Griffin really paved the way for professional pups like me breaking into the biz.

Family Guy is often compared to The Simpsons and South Park, as all three are relatively potty-mouthed pop culture commentators. But these days, it seems people have a special place in their hearts for the Quahog residents, the same way the Simpsons were the “it” family of the 1990s.

Revenge is a dish best served by a fire blaster

Stewie Griffin, diabolical baby genius, is squarely at the top. Everyone loves an evil infant, apparently: men, women and everyone of all ages.

Then papa bear Peter Griffin comes in for second place with just about everyone as well. Men and women equally appreciate his crude nature and low-intellectual capacity.

Brian Griffin, the intellectual yin to Peter Griffin’s dimwit yang, rounds out the consensus top 3. If you ask me, he should be number 1, but maybe I’m biased because he’s my people. Dog people.

Brian can drive - I hope one day to get a license

Glenn Quagmire is generally thought to be the fourth best of the extended Family Guy family, but 13-17 year old girls liked the oversexed creepy neighbor slightly less than everyone else. They actually prefer the Evil Monkey.

Men like Ernie the Giant Chicken for #5, and they voted for him just enough to make him round out the top five for the general ranking population. But overall, girls preferred Evil Monkey, and they only liked Ernie enough to be #8. I suppose they aren’t as big of fans of his prolonged action takeaway scenes with Peter as they are of the scary little animal that torments Chris.

And among 18-24 year olds of both genders, Death was #5 character above both Ernie the Giant Chicken and Evil Monkey. I guess 18-24 year olds are pretty fearless!

Men like Cleveland more than women, and women like Lois way more than men. Lois doesn’t show up in any top ten for men of any age group, in fact, but she appears in ALL of them for women.

Women also prefer Chris Griffin to Herbert (the pedophile), and the only group that shows Meg Griffin any top ten love is 13-17 year old girls. And surprisingly or not, Kool Aid Guy gets the most support from women over 35. Analyze that how you will.

Koolio, as I like to call him, showing up uninvited

If you want to see the results yourself, click here, and if you want to put in your two cents, rank away right here.
If you want to rank Family Guy Episodes, click here, and if you want to vote for the best cartoon characters, click here.

Royality TV: Will and Kate Mania

rebecca@top7.com — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 16:51:14 +0000

What are two things girls dream about when they’re young? Simple: Being a princess, and being a bride. Put those things together, and you have the movie The Princess Bride, one of my favorite movies of all time. You also have a recipe for a media frenzy: Kate Middleton and Prince William’s royal wedding.

Add to that the fact that Prince William is rather untouched by the scandals that have plagued his family in recent years. The cherubic-faced twenty-eight year old has never gotten divorced nor dressed up like Hitler, never abdicated his throne nor been a spokesman for Weight Watchers. In fact, we, the adoring masses, love him all the more since he has been bereaved of his beloved mother, our People’s Princess. He’s the perfect pedigree for our royal obsession.

And now we have Kate: Kate Middleton is also the perfect example of the pauper princess-to-be. She comes from a common family but has the grace and refinement of necessary to serve as a role model and royal. She’s never made a public misstep and the people of England have not only grown to accept her, but grown to obsess over her. After all, she is flawlessly beautiful and picture perfect with Wills.

Taken together, Will and Kate were destined to adorn pictures, newsreels and memorabilia forever after. Plus, David Beckham will be there. It’s like all of England’s cultural phenomena will join forces to create a televisual solar eclipse. Don’t look directly at it because the hotness will burn your face off.

The best part about the wedding is, in my opinion, googling “Will and Kate” and seeing what pops up. Its the best thermometer of our collective crazy. Here are some of the gems, in order of how they appear on the search page, and, coincidentally, in descending order of sanity:

1. “Royal Wedding: Will Kate Middleton be the Most Beautiful Royal…”
2. “Royal Wedding: Will Kate Middleton Wear a Tiara?”
3. “Kate Middleton & Camilla: Who Will Curtsy to Whom…”
4. “Who Will Design Kate Middleton and Prince William’s wedding bands…”
5. “Will and Kate Toilet Seats, Condoms Join Tacky London Souvenirs…”

Okay, I think you get it.

Will and Kate mania is underway, and people have legitimately gone insane. There is no cure. The only thing to do is to prepare ourselves for the upcoming event with the following information defenses:

Step 1: Ranking Wedding Movies. As mentioned above, The Princess Bride might naturally be the first thing to watch, being that it involves both a princess and a bride. You’ll get a speech about “mawage” and “twu wuv” and the funniest fairy tale this side of Shrek. But then you’ve got on the other end of the spectrum we have Wedding Crashers. Imagine Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson got to toast Kate and Will. I think we would all love to see that come to pass.
Step 2: Ranking British Royal Family Movies. Ranging from very to somewhat less boring — I kid! These are great examples of period pieces and dramatic mastery, with Shakespeare in Love, Elizabeth, The Queen, and this year’s best picture winner The King’s Speech in their company.
Step 3: Rank Power Couples. And if the future King and Queen of the United Kingdom aren’t a power couple, than I don’t know who is, apart from couples with actual powers, like in the X-Men or something. But I haven’t ruled out the possibility that Kate and William have magical powers, including but not limited to the power of flight. They’re my #1 power couple for sure.

Get to it before Royal Fever takes hold and you start buying commemorative toilet seats!

Rank Wedding Movies HERE
Rank British Royal Family Movies HERE
Rank Power Couples HERE

With Favorite Harry Potter Characters, Boys and Girls Are Under the Same Spell, (Mostly)

rebecca@top7.com — Mon, 18 Apr 2011 11:38:59 +0000

Its starting to feel like summer to me, playing on the beach, barking up a storm in the sand. And you know what summer means: blockbusters. I can finally chow down on some buttery popcorn goodness while watching this superhero and that sequel, turn my brain off, and have some fun in the air-conditioned non-sun. Global warming is taking its toll on my furry self.

What am I most excited to see this summer? Snakes on a Plane 2? No, silly: Harry Potter 8.

Also known as Harry Potter 7, 2.0.

Also known as The Deathly Hallows, Part DEATH. Merlin’s Beard! It’s going to be great.

The wizard buddies all together

Hermione Granger alter ego Emma Watson just turned 21 over the weekend, and this really got me thinking about the characters themselves. According to the results of the Top7 Topic about Harry Potter Characters, it was the lightning-faced boy wonder himself that was voted the favorite, with Hermione coming in at a close second.

At first I thought that it might make a difference to filter by boy and girl voters, perhaps the girls choosing Hermione for her girl power image, or maybe the opposite. Maybe they’d choose Harry because they think he’s a cutie. Either way you break it down though, Hermione is still second to Harry.

HOWEVER, in third place for the boys comes in wizarding mentor extraordianire Albus Dumbledore, whereas for the girls, ginger icon Ron Weasley weasles his way into the third spot.

Interestingly enough, Harry and Hermione keep the top two spots no matter what age group is voting as well, with Harry at number 1 and Hermione trailing behind in second place. For the 13-24 year old boys, Dumbledore pushes Ron out of #3, but once we get to 25 years and older in the boys, Ron edges Dumbledore outta there.

The #1 and #2 Favorite Characters

Only in 35+ boys did Hermione get edged out of the #2 spot into #3, replaced by Dobby of all people. Hermione’s legal now, men. It’s all okay to vote for her instead of the creepy animated house elf.

Let’s Just Take It Down a Notch, Mr. Brown

Bojan — Thu, 07 Apr 2011 13:35:58 +0000

You know, dogs like me can like pretty much everyone. Especially people who give us food and/or treats. But Chris Brown, you are a mystery, wrapped in a riddle, surrounded by enigma, bound by an aura of blockhead, that I cannot wrap my floppy ears around. I will be the first puppy to admit that your smooth voice and crazy dance moves hypnotize me, more than Animal Planet or that guy in the mirror. However, the best way to force someone out of a smooth hypnosis of pop music is to punch that guy in or around the face. And you continue to do this to people. Why?

We were all incredulous two years ago when we found out that you were stupid and careless enough to push around the newest princess of pop, Rihanna. First off, beating your girlfriend is so stone-age, so Neanderthal. To be a pop star you have to be ahead of the times, not behind them. Second of all, she was one of the most famous public figures of the time already. I mean, I knew about her, and I’m a dog. How is it possible that you didn’t think that bruising on her expensive face would be front page news. It was super dumb, and incredibly wrong. And frankly I can’t believe anyone in the public forgave you.

Chris and his dog friend

But you were young, so cried your supporters. And man oh man, you can dance. And sing. And you can dance and sing at the same time, which people with two legs say is pretty hard. So incredible as it was, the public was willing to give you a second-chance-ish-sort-of-thing. Convicted felons who’ve assaulted one of America’s sweethearts don’t typically receive such treatment. Would you step up to the plate and prove to us that you’ve grown? That it was a childish indiscretion and you’ve paid your dues to society? That you’re now as soft as cotton candy? Mmmm… cotton candy.

Well, as Robin Roberts of Good Morning America might attest, you’re still a troubled young man. As a pooch, I don’t get out much on my own so I watch a lot of daytime television. The other group of people with that pedigree is stay-at-home moms, the main viewership if the Good Morning America program. Not the ideal time and place to let your felon flag fly. So punching through a window and causing the ABC network to consider filing a police report against you was not a good career move. Maybe on FOX primetime it would have worked, or maybe it would have come off better on Saturday Night Live, where, ironically, you did great. But Good Morning America is not a solid place to take off your shirt and get in the face of a 50-year-old woman wearing a cardigan sweater named Robin. It’s just weird and off-putting.

Chris is lookin' kinda wiley over here

Basically, I think the solution here is to sign up for some sort of 12-step anger management program run by Dr. Laura plus Dr. Phil plus Dr. Drew Pinsky from VH1 Celebrity Rehab. Maybe take up some light Buddhism. Before you get to have your next comeback, I want you to sit with Oprah for a full 60 minutes, with her baiting you with a combination of Rihanna questions, and “yo mama” jokes. Then you might want to consider wearing a muzzle and/or a leash for the rest of 2011 while your rehabilitate your image. I can lend you one. It would both help your with your tarnished reputation, and also I would personally be less scared of running into you on the street.
That being said, I love “Yeahx3” and “Champion.” Please don’t hurt me.

To rank Musical Comebacks, click HERE.
To rank our girl RIHANNA’s songs, click HERE.

To rank Chris Brown’s songs, click HERE.